Self-Control

1 Corinthians 9:24-27; Titus 2:11-14; Galatians 5:22-23; Romans 7:18

Self-control:  The control of self by The Spirit.


It is not: 

• Uncontrolled lust  Proverbs 6:26
• Uncontrolled spending  Proverbs 21:20
• Uncontrolled ambition Proverbs 23:4
• Uncontrolled drinking Proverbs 23:29-30
• Uncontrolled anger Proverbs 29:11; Proverbs 25:28

A Self-Controlled Life 1 Corinthians 9:24-27

• A life with goals  v. 24
• Our Vision
• Share the good news of Christ with others.
• Model Christ in all aspects of life.
• Engage in loving relationships with other believers.
• Surrender our lives joyfully to God.
• Serve God and others with our abilities and resources.
• A life with discipline v. 25
• A life with focus v. 25-26
• A life with God directed thinking  v.27; Romans 12:1-2

A key to living the self-controlled life is God’s grace. Titus 2:11-14

• Grace redeems us. v. 11, 14
• Grace reforms us (12, 14b).  v. 12, 14
• Grace rewards us. v. 13; Galatians 5:16, 25

Fruit of the Spirit Self Assessment Test (doc)

Gentleness

Galatians 5:22-23

• Understanding Gentleness Matthew 5:5; Titus 3:2
• Gentleness is Strength under Control. Matthew 21:5; Matthew 26:52-53; John 13:3-5; Numbers 12:6-8; Numbers 12:13; Matthew 11:28-29
• Demonstrating Gentleness
• Demonstrate gentleness by not acting like a know it all.  1 Thessalonians 2:7
• Demonstrate gentleness by sharing the gospel with humility to people far from God. 1 Peter 3:15
• Demonstrate gentleness by helping restore believers who are struggling with sin. Galatians 6:1
• Demonstrate gentleness by treating others as VIP’s. Philippians 2:3-5; James 3:16-17
• Demonstrate gentleness by speaking words of  encouragement to others. James 3:6-8; Ephesians 4:29
• Demonstrate gentleness by being patient when disappointed by others. Ephesians 4:2; 1 Kings 19:11-12

“Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near”

(Philippians 4:5, NIV).

Gentleness:I am able to bear the slights of others and refrain from reaction while maintaining a tranquil, humble spirit.

Kindness

Galatians 5:22-23

• God’s kindness is not your natural inclination. Romans 3:12
• God’s kindness is best demonstrated with your enemies. Luke 6:27-36; Ephesians 4:32; Colossians 3:12; 1 Corinthians 13:4; Luke 10:30-37; Luke 10:31-32
• God’s kindness is a key motive for your life to be different. 1 Peter 2:1-3

 
Ways to reflect God’s kindness to others:

• Give people mercy - refusing to treat them poorly even when they deserve it. Titus 3:4-5
• Give people grace – showering them with compassion and love even when they do not deserve it. John 3:16; Romans 5:8
• Let people hear kindness in your speech. Colossians 4:6; Ephesians 4:29
• Show kindness to people different than you. Matthew 5:16

 
 Application: I consistently make a point of encouraging people and lending a helping hand
even when it’s not convenient.

Patience

 Galatians 5:22-23

Patience: two Greek words - slow & anger. So it means being slow to get angry. Exodus 34:6; Ephesians 4:2-3

• The Holy Spirit reminds you of God’s patience with you. Colossians 3:12-14
• The Holy Spirit encourages you to remember the valuable impact God’s patience has in your life. Romans 2:4

Repentance – changing direction. It is deciding to change the direction of your life to line up with following God.

• It is God’s patience that allows you time to become humble before Him.
• It is God’s patience that allows you time to live a surrendered life before Him.
• It is God’s patience that demonstrates how much He cares for you. 2 Peter 3:9
• The Holy Spirit asks you to exercise this same patience with others. Colossians 3:13

How to managing your anger – your impatience:

• Realize the cost. Proverbs 29:22; Proverbs 15:18; Proverbs 14:29; Proverbs 14:17; Proverbs 29:11
• Decide to control it. Proverbs 16:32; Ephesians 4:26
• Delay your response. Proverbs 29:11
• Reprogram your thinking. Romans 12:2
• Associate with people that are patient. Proverbs 22:24-25
• Rely on God’s help. Romans 15:5-6

Application: When people or things are not moving as quickly as I would like, I am able to wait gracefully and absorb my frustration.

Peace

“The Fruit of the Spirit is Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness, and Self-Control” (Galatians 5:22-23a, NIV).

 “Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men!” (Luke 2:14, NKJ)

 “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you….” John 14:27 (NIV).

“…The Prince of Peace. Of the increase of his government and peace there will be no end...” Isaiah 9:6-7 (NIV).

• Peace – What it is
• God’s Peace is not about avoiding a problem.
• God’s Peace is not about appeasing another person.
• God’s Peace (Shalom) is a sense of well-being, a sense of a foundation for life that comes from following God. Isaiah 48:17-1; Judges 6
• Peace – How it works
• Peace with God comes through Jesus Christ. Romans 5:1; Colossians 1:19-20; John 14:27
• Peace of God comes when you include God in all aspects of your life. Philippians 4:6-9
• You include Him by sharing your worries and fears with Him. (v.6)
• You include Him by expressing thankfulness to Him. (v.6)
• You include Him by giving your attention to His values. (v.8)
• You include Him by putting into practice His life principles.  (v.9) James 1:22
•  Peace on earth comes through conducting yourself towards others according to God’s will, not yours. Colossians 3:15; Romans 12:18; Philippians 4:2-3; 1 Corinthians 6:19-20; John 13:34; Matthew 22:39
• How to be a Peacemaker: P.E.A.C.E.
•  P  - Plan a peace conference. Matthew 5:23-24; Psalm 34:14
• Take the initiative.
• Work hard at peacemaking.
• E - Empathize with their feelings. 1 Peter 3:8; Philippians 2:4; Romans 15:2
• Listen without lecturing.
• Make an effort to understand.
• Focus on the needs of others.
• A -   Attack the problem, not the person. Ephesians 4:15; Ephesians 4:25; Ephesians 4:29
• Never compare.
• Never condemn.
• Never command.
• Never challenge.
• Never condescend.
• Never contradict.
• Never confuse.
• C  -  Cooperate as much as possible. James 3:17-18; Psalm 37:3
• E  -  Emphasize reconciliation, not resolution.
• Reconciliation: to re-establish the relationship.
• Resolution: to resolve every issue.  2 Corinthians 5:18
• Application: I am consistent in staying in a place of rest and freedom from anxiety even when I am under pressure.

Joy

“The Fruit of the Spirit is Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Gentleness, Faithfulness and Self-Control” (Galatians 5:22-23a, NIV).

Psalm 16:11; 1 Thessalonians 5:16; Romans 12:12; Philippians 4:4

• If you wait until you are happy with your life you will rarely possess joy. John 16:33
• “happiness” - from the English word “happenstance” which means “something that HAPPEN’s because of a circumSTANCE.”
• God’s joy comes from adopting His perspective of life. James 1:2-4; 1 Peter 4:12-13; Romans 5:1-11
• God’s perspective is that you now possess a right standing before Him – the holy God. (v.1)
• God’s perspective is that you have a relationship of peace with Him. (v.1)
• God’s perspective is that you are deeply loved by Him. (v.5-8)
• God’s perspective is that your future is safe from His judgment.(v. 9-10)
• God’s  perspective is that you have reason to be full of joy – you are His friend. (v.11)
• God’s perspective is that He rejoices over you. Zephaniah 3:17; Acts 16:22-25
• Godly perspectives to live by:
• Focus on giving rather than receiving. Acts 20:35
• Focus on healing rather than hurting. Colossians 3:13; Ephesians 4:32
• Focus on God’s power rather than your problems. Psalm 62:8; Ephesians 3:20
• Joy killers in relationships:
• Selfishness. James 4:1-2; James 3:16
• Bitterness Hebrews 12:15
• Fear. Proverbs 12:25
• Fear makes us defensive.
• Fear makes us distant.
• Fear makes us demanding.
• Fill your heart with singing to God.  (v.19)
• Consistently express an attitude of gratitude to God. (v.20)
• Highly value fellow believers, serving them in love. (v.21) Philippians 2:3-4; Nehemiah 8:10

Application:
In times of difficulty, I draw on an inner joy and speak cheerful words of praise to God
instead of complaining.

Love

Galatians 5:22; 1 Corinthians 13
 
Some general observations:

• The word  “fruit” is in the singular.
• These “fruits” are character qualities good for everyone.
• A lack of this fruit means you are not living by the Spirit.
• Fruit-growing is a process so baby fruit is still fruit.

Fruit #1 - LOVE

• Love is the law of God’s Kingdom. James 2:8; 1 John 3:11; Romans 13:8; 1 Peter 1:22; John 15:9-12
• Love is something you DO.  John 3:16; 1 John 3:16-19; 1 Corinthians 13:4-8a
• Greek words for love:
• Eros: a sensual love, a passionate love; used to indicate the love of a man and a woman for each other; embracing all aspects of sexual desire; not found in the NT.
• Philia: the most common word for love. It indicates a fondness, between persons within or outside the context of family. Friendships. Philadelphia called the city of brotherly love.
• Agape: not necessarily a stronger word then eros or philia in Greek usage. But the NT writers used it to describe a love beyond those other words. The NT brings a meaning that has much less to do with feelings of the heart and more to do with feelings of the mind. It is as much an act of the will as an act of the emotions. It is a conscious action, something that you decide to do.
• Love comes from God, not from your natural self. Galatians 5:22; 1 John 4:7; 1 Corinthians 13:4-7; Ephesians 4:15; John 13:35
• General insights:
• Love is intentional.  A command – Matthew 22:37-38
• Love is impossible by yourself.
• Love is always appropriate – don’t wait.
• Love makes you vulnerable.
• "Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to be sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness, but in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken, but it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. The only place outside of heaven where you can be safe from all dangers of love is hell." C.S. Lewis
• Love is unconditional.

Application:
I maintain an unselfish, tender, caring heart towards people that is free from a critical spirit.